When it comes down to it - a true friend cares much more about you than your feelings or how you or anyone else will react to what they have to say…..they don’t shy away from telling you what you need to hear even if you won’t like it.
Yes, and it seems also that we are more open and responsive to constructive criticism (how I'm interpreting telling us what we need to hear) from a true friend than even a good work colleague or familiar neighbor.
A very hard truth. Even the very closest relationships fail on this level. Knowing what is best for a person, as opposed to something strongly held on an emotional level by that person, can be difficult to achieve.
Anya, I was pleased that you liked my comments, though I missed the central issue. The question of offense is almost universal as I asserted. My experience is that some individuals are attitudinally predisposed to take offense. One assumes that these individuals are deeply injured or damaged, and they have not found a way out of that approach to others. Whether a person is predisposed to mistrust another's statements goes back to respect, or perhaps generalized good will.
As to your primary question, can we take offense from another offense; that seems quite complicated. If you care for another, how can you not feel for that person if you sense a damaging or unfair treatment? We see this aspect of "friendship" all the way up to groups, politics and nations. My opinion is that "The enemy of my enemy is my friend" is one of the most used phrases in personal relations and in global politics, so the idea of friendly nations is among the most volatile concepts through time. Underlying this whole discussion seems to be what is good or virtuous, v. what is expedient, or self serving. Sorry. I ramble.
Hi. Practice what you preach. You did just that with your piece of writing.
YOU are ny friend section no.3.You are my friend because you give me goodness with the insight based on the philosophy of Aristotle and his predecessors .
Telling a friend what they need to know, may be a straight line to losing them. It's happened to me three times. Once I misunderstood my friend, told them what I perceived they needed to know. They wouldn't accept my apology even after I explained my error. I lost another to a set of divergent beliefs that would not mesh or be ignored. The third has come from telling my pal what they needed to know. They didn't like it and walked away. My explanations of why I said it were not heard.
When it comes down to it - a true friend cares much more about you than your feelings or how you or anyone else will react to what they have to say…..they don’t shy away from telling you what you need to hear even if you won’t like it.
Yes, and it seems also that we are more open and responsive to constructive criticism (how I'm interpreting telling us what we need to hear) from a true friend than even a good work colleague or familiar neighbor.
A very hard truth. Even the very closest relationships fail on this level. Knowing what is best for a person, as opposed to something strongly held on an emotional level by that person, can be difficult to achieve.
I have heard it described that friends of pleasure stare into each other's eyes. Friends of virtue stare in the same direction.
No one would choose to live a friendless existence, even on the condition of having all other good things.” - true friend is priceless !
A true friend cares about your soul.
Aristotle nailed this one.
Anya, I was pleased that you liked my comments, though I missed the central issue. The question of offense is almost universal as I asserted. My experience is that some individuals are attitudinally predisposed to take offense. One assumes that these individuals are deeply injured or damaged, and they have not found a way out of that approach to others. Whether a person is predisposed to mistrust another's statements goes back to respect, or perhaps generalized good will.
As to your primary question, can we take offense from another offense; that seems quite complicated. If you care for another, how can you not feel for that person if you sense a damaging or unfair treatment? We see this aspect of "friendship" all the way up to groups, politics and nations. My opinion is that "The enemy of my enemy is my friend" is one of the most used phrases in personal relations and in global politics, so the idea of friendly nations is among the most volatile concepts through time. Underlying this whole discussion seems to be what is good or virtuous, v. what is expedient, or self serving. Sorry. I ramble.
Hi. Practice what you preach. You did just that with your piece of writing.
YOU are ny friend section no.3.You are my friend because you give me goodness with the insight based on the philosophy of Aristotle and his predecessors .
I am grateful to you. 🙏
herbert8
Article was well done. It got me thinking of a post you had on Socrates and all his personality quirks. Can you forward that to me?
Which one? We've had a few over the years... Are you referencing the one about Socrates being a bad husband? There is also this one: https://classicalwisdom.substack.com/p/was-socrates-really-guilty-of-his
Wow, what a great article. Amazing philopsher Aristotle.
Telling a friend what they need to know, may be a straight line to losing them. It's happened to me three times. Once I misunderstood my friend, told them what I perceived they needed to know. They wouldn't accept my apology even after I explained my error. I lost another to a set of divergent beliefs that would not mesh or be ignored. The third has come from telling my pal what they needed to know. They didn't like it and walked away. My explanations of why I said it were not heard.
The one where he is a bad husband is the one I'd like to see again.